Two Very Big-Time and Important college professors give weekly lessons on how to adult, covering everything from how to dress like a GD grown-up to growing your own vegetables like a boss. Strap in your ears and get ready to be adult AF.
Episodes (22)
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Get a Massage, and Don't be Weird About It
Get a Massage, and Don't be Weird About It
Published: 7 Mar 2018 Duration: 31:59Massages are supposed to be relaxing...so why do they give us so much anxiety? This week, the Smiths take on the many discomforts of getting naked with a stranger and saying, "Put your hands all over me." They teach you how to overcome any ... Read more →Massages are supposed to be relaxing...so why do they give us so much anxiety? This week, the Smiths take on the many discomforts of getting naked with a stranger and saying, "Put your hands all over me." They teach you how to overcome any ... Read more →
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Handle Credit Card Debt Like a Brave Hero
Handle Credit Card Debt Like a Brave Hero
Published: 28 Feb 2018 Duration: 35:16We got a letter from a listener who wanted to know just how scared he should be about getting his first solo credit card. And boy, did we run with that. In this episode, we talk credit scores, smart strategies for paying down huge debt, and... Read more →We got a letter from a listener who wanted to know just how scared he should be about getting his first solo credit card. And boy, did we run with that. In this episode, we talk credit scores, smart strategies for paying down huge debt, and... Read more →
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Face Winter Weather Like a Grown-Up Hero
Face Winter Weather Like a Grown-Up Hero
Published: 20 Feb 2018 Duration: 36:55It’s cold. It is just unbelievably, and endlessly, cold. Unless you live somewhere warm, in which case, we politely invite you to just kiss right off. ‘Cause we’re cold. Just unbelievably, and endlessly, cold. Fortunately, the Smiths have s... Read more →It’s cold. It is just unbelievably, and endlessly, cold. Unless you live somewhere warm, in which case, we politely invite you to just kiss right off. ‘Cause we’re cold. Just unbelievably, and endlessly, cold. Fortunately, the Smiths have s... Read more →
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Bear and Raise Children Without Causing Irreparable Harm
Bear and Raise Children Without Causing Irreparable Harm
Published: 14 Feb 2018 Duration: 47:26The decision to become a parent is a big one. There's a lot to consider, like "Will I cause accidental and irreparable lifelong harm to the emotional state of a real human person?" The Smiths grapple with the challenges and rewards of havin... Read more →The decision to become a parent is a big one. There's a lot to consider, like "Will I cause accidental and irreparable lifelong harm to the emotional state of a real human person?" The Smiths grapple with the challenges and rewards of havin... Read more →
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Disneyland Like an Adult
Disneyland Like an Adult
Published: 7 Feb 2018 Duration: 59:18It's hard to really appreciate Disneyland when you're a kid, and when you're a parent, it's like, ugh, now I have to go on all the baby rides with my kid, ugh. The best way to go to Disneyland is to go by your own childless self! It's not c... Read more →It's hard to really appreciate Disneyland when you're a kid, and when you're a parent, it's like, ugh, now I have to go on all the baby rides with my kid, ugh. The best way to go to Disneyland is to go by your own childless self! It's not c... Read more →
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Be a Better Valentine. Or Don't. We Don't Really Care.
Be a Better Valentine. Or Don't. We Don't Really Care.
Published: 31 Jan 2018 Duration: 58:21[FAIR WARNING, this episode gets more explicit than most, in some really strange and surprising ways. But don't blame us. Blame our guest.] Valentine's Day is pretty much the worst, and anyone who likes it is dumb. That said, we've got some... Read more →[FAIR WARNING, this episode gets more explicit than most, in some really strange and surprising ways. But don't blame us. Blame our guest.] Valentine's Day is pretty much the worst, and anyone who likes it is dumb. That said, we've got some... Read more →
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Get a Room of Your Own
Get a Room of Your Own
Published: 24 Jan 2018 Duration: 37:38Look, we can't all just be in everyone else's space, like, all the time. Sometimes we have to get away into our own little hovels of secrecy and leave-me-aloneness. Those are the places where we can get creative, blow off some steam, or jus... Read more →Look, we can't all just be in everyone else's space, like, all the time. Sometimes we have to get away into our own little hovels of secrecy and leave-me-aloneness. Those are the places where we can get creative, blow off some steam, or jus... Read more →
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Behave Yourself at the Bar
Behave Yourself at the Bar
Published: 17 Jan 2018 Duration: n/aIt's hard to behave well at the bar. We know it's not your fault, it's alcohol's fault. Almost everything is alcohol's fault. But as adults, we should all take steps to be better bar-goers. That doesn't just mean not getting into fights and... Read more →It's hard to behave well at the bar. We know it's not your fault, it's alcohol's fault. Almost everything is alcohol's fault. But as adults, we should all take steps to be better bar-goers. That doesn't just mean not getting into fights and... Read more →
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Unlock the Secrets of Secret Menus That are Secret
Unlock the Secrets of Secret Menus That are Secret
Published: 10 Jan 2018 Duration: 50:52Pssst. Hey, you. Do you like food? SHHHH! Not so loud! We're talking secret menus on the podcast this week...we're giving a whole rundown of who's who and what's what in the dark, seedy underbelly of black market foodstuffs, including a who... Read more →Pssst. Hey, you. Do you like food? SHHHH! Not so loud! We're talking secret menus on the podcast this week...we're giving a whole rundown of who's who and what's what in the dark, seedy underbelly of black market foodstuffs, including a who... Read more →
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Avoid the Emergency Room Like a Responsible Adult
Avoid the Emergency Room Like a Responsible Adult
Published: 3 Jan 2018 Duration: 49:28Look, is it easy to keep yourself from sticking power drills through your palm flesh? No. But is it important to stop doing that? Heck yes! Emergency room visits are no treat, despite the fact that George Clooney was so dreamy in that one s... Read more →Look, is it easy to keep yourself from sticking power drills through your palm flesh? No. But is it important to stop doing that? Heck yes! Emergency room visits are no treat, despite the fact that George Clooney was so dreamy in that one s... Read more →
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Kiss Those New Year's Resolutions Goodbye
Kiss Those New Year's Resolutions Goodbye
Published: 27 Dec 2017 Duration: 46:05This week, the Smiths dispute the supposed "merits" of New Year's resolutions and ask that age-old question: "Why don't we just be better, like, all the time?" They're joined by professional year-round ass-kicker Beth Ryan, who explains the... Read more →This week, the Smiths dispute the supposed "merits" of New Year's resolutions and ask that age-old question: "Why don't we just be better, like, all the time?" They're joined by professional year-round ass-kicker Beth Ryan, who explains the... Read more →
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Capture Santa for Your Own Selfish Purposes
Capture Santa for Your Own Selfish Purposes
Published: 20 Dec 2017 Duration: 34:19Setting a trap for Santa Claus is a Christmas Eve tradition as old as time itself. In this episode, the Smiths discuss the most effective types of Santa traps, as well as how they'd spend their three Christmas wishes, since, when it comes t... Read more →Setting a trap for Santa Claus is a Christmas Eve tradition as old as time itself. In this episode, the Smiths discuss the most effective types of Santa traps, as well as how they'd spend their three Christmas wishes, since, when it comes t... Read more →
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Contribute to Christmas Dinner Like a Champ
Contribute to Christmas Dinner Like a Champ
Published: 13 Dec 2017 Duration: 49:56This week, the Smiths are going all in on this whole "family" thing by making the bold suggestion that it's time for you to adult up and bring some homemade goodness to your holiday party. What's that, you say? "I'm worse at cooking than I ... Read more →This week, the Smiths are going all in on this whole "family" thing by making the bold suggestion that it's time for you to adult up and bring some homemade goodness to your holiday party. What's that, you say? "I'm worse at cooking than I ... Read more →
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Face Your Family Like a Holiday Hero (UPDATED)
Face Your Family Like a Holiday Hero (UPDATED)
Published: 6 Dec 2017 Duration: 44:43The holidays are nothing if not the perfect time to practice your latest political diatribes and hygiene-related insults. BUT ALLOW YOURSELF A MOMENT TO DREAM! What if you could go home for the holidays and NOT leave all bruised, bloodied, ... Read more →The holidays are nothing if not the perfect time to practice your latest political diatribes and hygiene-related insults. BUT ALLOW YOURSELF A MOMENT TO DREAM! What if you could go home for the holidays and NOT leave all bruised, bloodied, ... Read more →
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Decorate for the Holidays Like a Serious Real Person
Decorate for the Holidays Like a Serious Real Person
Published: 29 Nov 2017 Duration: 53:28Some people think decorating for the holidays is easy, and that's absolutely correct. Tape some Christmas lights to your couch, and you're all set! Well, that's what the Professors Smith thought, anyway. But then Hollis Scarborough of Silve... Read more →Some people think decorating for the holidays is easy, and that's absolutely correct. Tape some Christmas lights to your couch, and you're all set! Well, that's what the Professors Smith thought, anyway. But then Hollis Scarborough of Silve... Read more →
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Communicate with Laser-Like Focus
Communicate with Laser-Like Focus
Published: 22 Nov 2017 Duration: 53:53Look, let's face it: Communication is hard. And it's not made any easier by the fact that digital platforms give us a pretty good GD excuse to say things to people without having to actually talk to them. But it's important to know how to c... Read more →Look, let's face it: Communication is hard. And it's not made any easier by the fact that digital platforms give us a pretty good GD excuse to say things to people without having to actually talk to them. But it's important to know how to c... Read more →
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Get Some GD Culture
Get Some GD Culture
Published: 15 Nov 2017 Duration: 52:09Culture is the sweet-ass spice of life that makes it worth living. Shakespeare said that. Or maybe it was Gandhi. Or maybe Axl Rose? Look, it doesn't matter. Culture is important, and we're diving brain-first into our new Get Some GD Cultur... Read more →Culture is the sweet-ass spice of life that makes it worth living. Shakespeare said that. Or maybe it was Gandhi. Or maybe Axl Rose? Look, it doesn't matter. Culture is important, and we're diving brain-first into our new Get Some GD Cultur... Read more →
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De-Stress Already
De-Stress Already
Published: 8 Nov 2017 Duration: 42:50Boy, stress is sure awful. Not only does it cause anxiety, but, as the Smiths learned this week, it can lead to sudden and nigh-inexplicable death. Just absolute, total death. So join the guys as they dive into the wonderful world of de-str... Read more →Boy, stress is sure awful. Not only does it cause anxiety, but, as the Smiths learned this week, it can lead to sudden and nigh-inexplicable death. Just absolute, total death. So join the guys as they dive into the wonderful world of de-str... Read more →
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Handle Ghosts Like a GD Boss
Handle Ghosts Like a GD Boss
Published: 1 Nov 2017 Duration: 01:06:26Ghosts are a part of a real adult's everyday life. Don't believe us? Give the Smiths a chance to change your mind. Don't believe them? Well, that's valid. But maybe Neil Tobin, Necromancer will help convince you. With Neil's help, Clayton a... Read more →Ghosts are a part of a real adult's everyday life. Don't believe us? Give the Smiths a chance to change your mind. Don't believe them? Well, that's valid. But maybe Neil Tobin, Necromancer will help convince you. With Neil's help, Clayton a... Read more →
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Halloween Better
Halloween Better
Published: 25 Oct 2017 Duration: 53:46Look, there are a lot of seriously awful Halloween costume ideas out there. This week, with the help of Shannon Downey from Badass Cross Stitch, the Smiths navigate the landmine of bad choices, from the lame to the offensive, and throw out ... Read more →Look, there are a lot of seriously awful Halloween costume ideas out there. This week, with the help of Shannon Downey from Badass Cross Stitch, the Smiths navigate the landmine of bad choices, from the lame to the offensive, and throw out ... Read more →